How Suffering Can Lead to Action
Two weeks ago, I attended a conference where an agency owner shared a story that really resonated with me. In the first year of running their business, he and his co-founder were just winging it, trying their best to learn and manage the many aspects of starting a new venture. Inevitably, they faced overwhelming challenges, struggling to keep up and feeling like failures. Just as they were about to head off on vacation—or perhaps already on it—the unexpected happened. A client called with an urgent demand: the completion of a website project within a week, or else the contract would be canceled.
The stress was immense, and they experienced one of the most grueling weeks of their lives. It felt like teetering on the edge of burnout. But in that period of intense suffering, they made a pact: never again would they allow themselves to reach such a low point. That week became the catalyst for change. It fueled their motivation to make improvements, seek mentoring, and implement strategies to better manage their business. Their suffering led to action, and that action sparked growth.
The Power of Suffering as a Motivator
The concept of suffering as a driver for motivation isn’t new, but it’s something that people often overlook. It reminded me of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s Flow, where he recounts the story of a man working a summer job in a slaughterhouse. The grueling conditions—animals being processed for meat under the scorching summer sun with an overwhelming smell—became an epiphany for the worker. He swore to change his life for the better, and that vow was born out of suffering.
Finding Meaning Amidst Suffering
More recently, at a philosophy café, the conversation centered around whether life is fair, touching on existentialism and even shades of pessimism. The discussion brought forward stories of people who had found meaning through significant suffering, echoing the wisdom of Viktor Frankl. Frankl, who survived the Holocaust, founded logotherapy, a branch of psychology based on finding meaning in life’s suffering. He famously demonstrated that even in the direst of circumstances, human beings have the capacity to find purpose.
This principle resonates across various disciplines and philosophies. For example, studies have shown that people are more driven to avoid loss than to seek gain. They will work harder to avoid losing $10 than to earn $10. This disparity in motivation highlights how avoiding suffering—or acting to prevent it—can be a powerful catalyst for action.
The Role of Suffering in Buddhism and Modern Media
Buddhism, too, recognizes the central role of suffering in life, encapsulated in the quote, “Existence is suffering.” It’s a statement that initially sounds grim but holds profound wisdom. The acknowledgment that life inherently involves suffering is not an invitation to despair but rather a call to acceptance. By understanding and accepting suffering as a natural part of life, we can navigate it with greater resilience.
This idea of embracing all emotions, including suffering, is also mirrored in popular media. The animated film Inside Out illustrates this concept beautifully. It teaches that sadness is essential to the full spectrum of human experience. Attempting to suppress sadness also suppresses joy. You can’t selectively block emotions; it’s all or nothing. Recognizing this fact helps us see that suffering, sadness, and discomfort are not weaknesses to be avoided but essential parts of a rich and meaningful life.
A Balanced Perspective: Great Hopes and Low Expectations
One interesting point discussed at the philosophy café was the balance between expectations and reality. Our expectations shape our perception of satisfaction. By approaching life with great hopes but low expectations, we can maintain optimism without becoming disillusioned. This mindset can allow us to face suffering more readily, knowing it’s not the end of joy but part of the process.
Enlightenment in Everyday Life
One story that stuck with me involved a Buddhist monk with a modern twist—he has a YouTube channel! This monk shared an enlightening thought: while going to a monastery and detaching from worldly obligations can be a path to peace, achieving that same peace amidst the chaos of everyday life is a far greater challenge. Finding calm while climbing the career ladder, raising children, and dealing with life’s unpredictability—that is true enlightenment.
Embracing Suffering as a Path to Growth
We often try to avoid suffering at all costs. Yet, as these stories illustrate, it is often suffering that propels us into action, shapes our resolve, and leads to profound personal growth. Whether through life’s harsh lessons, stories of overcoming great odds, or philosophical reflections, suffering can be seen not just as an obstacle, but as a pivotal force that drives us to change.
So, the next time life throws a curveball your way, remember: it’s not just about surviving it. It’s about finding the lesson, taking action, and using it as fuel for growth. After all, life in all its complexity is meant to be lived fully—suffering and all.